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Posts tagged independence

My child is afraid of the dark!

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Has your child suddenly started to say, “I’m scared!”, “I don’t like the dark”, or “I’m scared of the dark”? If so, please be reassured that this is a very normal phase of development and can be experienced by lots of children, their parents and carers. Most often the biggest impact of this can be around bedtimes where little ones are typically on their own and it is dark. This sense of fear can have an impact on sleep, bedtimes or even cause waking in the night.

Separation anxiety and bedtime (including 10 tips to help!)

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. One area which families can find very challenging during the phases of separation anxiety is bedtimes and naptimes. In this blog we are going to specifically look at how and why separation anxiety might affect bedtimes and sleep.

Separation anxiety, SleepRebekah Frankcom26 January 2022parenting, children, families, nanny, childcare, separation, anxiety, separation anxiety, comforter, independence, routine, reassurance, developmental stage, development, separation anxiety and bedtime, bedtime routine

My child only wants me!

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Our children can be very set on things at times and this can even be in relation to wanting one parent to do everything for them and to be with them all the time. We can often find in these situations that we have one parent who seems to be favoured over the other.

This behaviour can be extremely draining for the ‘preferred’ parent at the time and can be very difficult (and upsetting at times) for the other parent (the ‘rejected’ one) who feels that they are not wanted or, sometimes, not even liked or loved.

We must remember that this is not about who your child does or doesn’t like, it is all about your child learning and developing, which includes learning what relationships feel like and how to manage them. They are practicing something that they will have to deal with for years to come through friendships, relationships and also with work colleagues. It is all about making sense of how and why we feel what we do!

How do I get my child to do the basic day to day things…like get dressed?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. This is a very common issue that parents face and it can be hugely frustrating and challenging when all you want to do is for your child to get dressed, put their shoes on, brush their teeth and tidy up their toys etc. One of the first things to think about is that when our children are babies, we do everything for them and they have very little input or choice in what happens when. Once our children start to find their voice and have the ability to do things independently, then they want to practice this as much as possible, it is a newfound freedom! This can however be exhausting for us as they are taking a great deal of time to do the simplest of things (which you know you can do in 2 mins!) because they are finding it tricky or just want to keep doing it over and over.

Behaviour, RoutinesRebekah Frankcom9 September 2020parenting, families, parenting tips, listen, life skills, tasks, independence, getting dressed, behaviour, learning opportunities, everyday tasks, choice, instructions, allow enough time

‘Chores’ and pocket money…

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. There is no right or wrong age to start getting children to help out with chores, it is more about what tasks are age appropriate for you to ask them to do. Firstly, I would try to avoid the word ‘chores’ as this can be seen, and felt, as being quite negative and not something your children are likely to approach with a positive attitude. In addition, chores could be seen as things that have to be done in order to get a reward, but many ‘chores’ or tasks are expected and required actions of our children as they develop into responsible adults.

OtherRebekah Frankcom26 August 2020parenting, families, parenting tips, listen, life skills, budgeting, chores, tasks, washing up, making the bed, laundry, pocket money, independence

When our children get older...

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. There is a wealth of information out there to support babies, toddler and pre-school children, but once they are over the age of 5 the information tends to be more limited and is often focused on school related topics.

Just because our children are getting older, it doesn’t mean that parenting gets easier or that you will have all the answers to the new phases and stages that your child might be going through. It can be challenging and sometimes make you feel like you are having to use guess work to get through it.

Parenting teenagers!

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. The blog which was bravely written by our 13 year old teenage friend (who we will call Jemma), is a really powerful read and she has been very honest about the issues she is facing in her teenage years. Parenting teenagers is always talked about in quite negative terms with comments such as “wait until they are teenagers”, “typical teenager, “I don’t envy you with teenagers!” etc. Teenagers do tend to have a bad reputation, but this is actually not all that different to the way people view the toddler stage and interestingly enough there are a lot of similarities between the two developmental stages. The brain is going through huge changes at both these points and so this is when we typically see more challenging behaviour and high emotions.

Tweens and TeensRebekah Frankcom22 January 2020parenting, families, independence, developmental stage, development, teenager, respect, empathy, trust, body image, resilience, safety, friendships

Teen Troubles - a letter

Hi, In the modern day, being a teenager is very hard. There are many challenges I face as a teenager, such as body image, social media, safety and friendship issues and I want to tell you about them and how I feel day to day.

Tweens and TeensRebekah Frankcom20 January 2020teenager, teen issues, social media, anxiety, body image, friendships, safety, parenting teens, independence, confidence

Don't leave me! Separation Anxiety and how to manage it...

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Over recent weeks I have been getting lots of questions about how to deal with babies and young children who are getting really upset when a parent or other main carer such as a nanny, grandparent etc is leaving them, whether this is going to school or nursery, or even just to go to the bathroom!

Separation anxietyRebekah Frankcom30 September 2019parenting, children, families, nanny, childcare, separation, anxiety, separation anxiety, comforter, independence, routine, reassurance, developmental stage, development

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