How can I get my baby / toddler to nap for longer?
Written by Claire Burgess and Emily Darwell, Family Consultants
This blog will take you through what is considered a ‘short nap’, why not sleeping for long enough might be a problem and how you can help your babies and toddlers to sleep for longer!
First of all, what is a ‘short’ nap?
Short naps are typically those which are 30-45 mins. Our babies are learning how to sleep and they need to develop the ability to ‘knit’ their sleep cycles together and, like with anything, this comes with time and practice. A typical sleep cycle is around 50-60 mins so anything less than 50 mins can be seen as a ‘short nap’.
Why can short naps be a problem?
If your little one is only having very short naps throughout the day you can find that they are not getting deep restorative sleep which can lead to a baby or toddler who is overtired and not happy during the day.
Short naps during the day can also lead to more disturbed nights as again, they are overtired and this means that they are not able to settle in the same way that they might if they have good quality naps during the day.
Short naps can be difficult for us as the adults as we are willing and hoping for our little one to have a good nap as we know that they will feel better for it and you then know that they are rested. We can feel disheartened and frustrated if each and every time our little one wakes early from a nap they still show signs of being tired.
What can I do to help them to sleep longer?
Under 5 months old
When you have a little one who is under 5 months their naps can be anything from 20 mins to 120 mins and this is all completely normal. It is from around 5 months that sleep matures and your little one starts to extend their naps for longer periods of time. It is important to note however that under the age of 5 months you can still work on getting slightly longer naps as this will only help your baby as they get older.
Here are some things that you can try to extend naps for an under 5 month old:
If your little one has woken from a short nap, try picking them up and rocking them back to sleep for 10-15 mins. At this age if it helps to lengthen the nap and they will be more settled by doing this, then go with it.
When you can see that your little one is stirring, gently placing your hand on their tummy and shushing can help relax them through to their next sleep phase.
If your little one is very tired and just not settling for the nap, then try a contact nap, this is where you sit and cuddle them for that nap. If they are exhausted and need to sleep then it is important that they get this, otherwise it can knock on to other naps that day, bedtime and then the night. Don’t worry about creating ‘bad habits’ at this age as you are doing what is needed to support your baby in getting them to understand what good sleep feels like.
Over 5 months old
Here are some things that you can try to extend naps for babies and toddlers over 5 months old:
Good Sleep Hygiene. It is important to have good sleep habits when your little one is over 5 months old as they will help your baby to prepare themselves for sleep by receiving these sleep ‘cues’. These cues are not only important for bed time, but also for nap time. Predictability of a routine helps baby to know what’s coming, enabling them to feel safe and secure and to know what is expected of them. The routine before nap should be a shorter version of your bedtime routine so think of cues, (similar words/phrases etc) you can make into a sleep association. By doing this you are teaching your baby that when you say these things it is time for sleep. You can, for example, start to say things such as “it’s sleepy time, let’s go upstairs for nap/bedtime”. If your little one has a comforter then it’s an idea to only bring it out just before nap or bedtime so it is only associated with sleep rather than as a toy / day time play item.
Timing is everything in order to help establish a good routine. Following baby’s cues and ensuring you are getting the timings correct is key as shorter naps can sometimes be the cause of a baby being put to sleep feeling over tired. You can also help by doing things at the same time each day having wake times and nap / bed times and meal times etc. at the same time in order to help establish a routine - this will help nap-time roughly land at the same time each day. All of this will help you and your baby recognise when they are starting to feel tired so you don't miss their sleep window. Look for cues such as, flapping their hands, avoiding eye contact, rubbing their eyes, face or ears, and the classic yawn. Keep in mind that children grow and change, and their nap schedule should change with them. Be aware of how long they go between naps, if naps are a problem it could be as simple as it’s the wrong time for them and that you are missing their sleep window.
Sleep environment. When we look at a baby's sleeping environment, we need to make sure that they first associate that room with sleep and not play. Personally we feel that bedrooms (if possible) should only have books and cuddly toys in them, rather than being a play / fun area with lots of stimulating toys.
The room should be a calm welcoming environment, with low lighting.
The temperature should be between 16-20 degrees.
When it’s time for sleep the room should be completely dark (use of blackout blinds possibly needed) and the night environment should be the same until morning!
If using a sound machine or music ensure it is on all night / all nap time so when baby naturally stirs they see their environment is the same, and feel safe to fall back to sleep. What your little one falls asleep with initially they are going to look for at around the 30-45 mins mark when they transition from one sleep cycle to the next so it is important that what they go to sleep with is still there when they make this transition.
Falling asleep themselves. This can be an area which takes practice and time for our little ones, but giving your child the opportunity to go into their cot to then settle themselves off to sleep can really help with lengthening naps. If they are put in their cot asleep, when they come to make that transition 30-45 mins later they are going to be taken by surprise that they are suddenly in their cot if their last memory before falling asleep was being in your arms or feeding. Giving them the opportunity to adjust to the sleep environment when first going to sleep helps them to feel comfortable and happy to go to sleep.
Are they hungry? This is something to consider in both the under 5 month and over 5 month age groups. It is difficult to sleep well if you are hungry and so we want our babies to have good calorie intake during the day. However this is not about feeding until they are fit to burst, as you are then likely to have a baby with tummy issues who is not able to sleep because they are feeling uncomfortable. It is about having a good feeding pattern which gives adequate time between feeds for those naps but also regular feeds (and mealtimes for those over 6 months) so that you don’t have a ‘hangry’ little one.
What else can I try?
Helping the transition - if you notice that your little one is waking at the 30-45 min time frame, so much so that you can set your watch by them, then you can look to help them with the transition between sleep cycles:
Go to your little one 5-10 mins before they typically wake from their short nap
Watch them as closely as you can and then put your hand on them and start to gentle shush them over the time that they would typically wake up.
This can help them to go through to the next sleep cycle and often if you do this for a few days or even a week for the naps, it can mean that they learn to do this independently and you no longer need to go in to do this.
The Wake to Sleep Method - The idea is to interrupt their sleep cycle to help extend the nap time, supporting your baby through the transition from one sleep cycle to the next! With this method you lightly rouse them around 30-40 minutes (depending on their typical nap length) into their nap by rubbing their belly, stroking hair, whispering their name etc softy, before they begin their transition into deeper sleep. You then let them to fall back off to sleep easing them into the next stage. This can be a risky method as it could mean that your little one could fully wake up and refuse to go back to sleep, however for some children it works well.
It can sometimes feel like naps are taking over your life and that you are spending a great deal of time trying to get your little one to take a nap, but when they do it is short and you end up starting the process all over again. Sleep is a science and it can take time to get it working well for you and your baby, but it will come and some of these tips and strategies will help.
For more information about sleep you might be interested in ‘Your Guide to Sleep’ - a step-by-step video guide, our other sleep blogs, or you might feel that you would like further support from a 1:1 sleep consultation - more information on our parenting consultations is here.
We also have a podcast - ‘Newborn to Teen and Everything in Between’ - listen here.